2012: Capture Your Grief: Day 4

Day 4. Most Treasured Item Something that relates to your baby/ies/child/ren. Maybe it is their hand and foot prints or a photograph. Whatever it is we would love to see it.

My thoughts: I have no “item” that is most treasured. It’s all treasured. Every item that equals their life. It all fits into a box. How can three lives fit into a little box? Seeing the other posts on the evolving Capture Your Grief page seems to confirm I’m not alone in that. Everything they touched. Every image I have of them. I cling to them. They’re all I have of three lives. Above: Ultrasound pictures from the 20 week ultrasound that I never shared. We found out Elliot was a boy! We also found out Alice was a girl; and that she had spina bifida and a huge list of problems that sent our world into a tail spin. Their footprints, arm bands (never used) and crib cards. The plaster molds of their beautiful feet. I can feel their perfect little feet. My daughter’s Big Sister shirt. I stayed up late making it so we could share the news with our family the next day. The little lambs from their funeral wearing the hats my nieces and nephews made for them. My daughter loves to play with them before returning them to my dresser where they smile at us each day. The blankets they were wrapped in. Their big sister. She IS a big sister. Cuddling with me in my hospital bed hours before I went into labor. Last: their gowns and bonnets. Beautifully hand made by a stranger who cared enough to give such a gift. The only thing they ever wore. Perfectly pressed by their grandma. Three lives that fit into a little box hidden in my hope chest.

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