2012: Capture Your Grief: Day 1

If you’re the grieving parent of a child you likely know CarlyMarie. This year I’m participating in her new worldwide project called Capture Your Grief. I plan/hope to capture a new inspired image or a picture from the past based on her topics as I walk through grief with thousands of parents around the world. I wanted to document that here as well. I’ll keep this brief and let the following images speak for themselves as we recognize Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. I will update as I’m able here.

I’m also adding notes about where I was last year at this time. The month of October was when we had confirmation of our pregnancy, found out about the triplets and had our appointment with the perinatologist. Six years ago I was also newly pregnant with our second child and delivered via emergency c-section on October 12th due to the baby growing in my fallopian tube (ectopic).

(Carly’s notes are with each inspiration topic and my comments follow each image)

Day 1. Sunrise I thought it would be sweet for us all to capture the beginning of this beautiful project and important month by us all getting up early to photograph the sunrise from wherever we are in the world.

My thoughts: It’s ironic right. The first day’s post is for a sunrise. Do you think I remembered or was physically able to remove my body from bed in time to take a sunrise picture? The answer above is quite obvious. Any of you who know me personally are not at all surprised by this. That said I think it illustrates my grief quite well for the first assignment. Nothing on this journey has been as it was hoped to be. But this is what I’ve been given. I try to find the light in so much darkness. So today although I missed my sunrise, God gave me a beautiful harvest moon instead. I took time to cherish it and thank Him for it. I like to imagine what the view is from Heaven tonight.

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7 thoughts on “2012: Capture Your Grief: Day 1

  1. My heart aches for you and your family….I wish I could do something…If there is, please let me know. I love you guys! And ditto Jess…Thank you for sharing.

  2. You are an amazing woman and I thank you for sharing your story! The pictures say it all…I feel your emotion through them ❤

  3. This is amazing, Janelle. You amaze me and my heart breaks all over again with you. Love the glimpse of those perfect and precious babies. Praying for your, Nate and Nora. Loving you.

  4. I will NEVER forget your babies. NEVER!! I am not be able to say them to you (in person) but I say them in my heart. Their footprints are on our fridge and I don’t think there is a day that I don’t see them and remember them. Truly, I never do. They are my reminder of everything precious and fragile. Until the pics above of the tops of their heads, I had never seen them but it didn’t matter…I don’t need to see them to have fallen in love with them. I’m so proud of you for taking this challenge and sharing your story. Though their death is so close to you, it’s easy for me to forget that everyday is a challenge and another day without them in your arms. Thank you for reminding me of that!

    Tawnda

  5. YOu are so beautiful. This just gets more and more beautiful. Be proud of the mother you are. Be prouder of the PERSON you are. Janelle, you amaze me. I’m here for you.

  6. This is such a beautiful record of all you have endured and the journey you are on. And I have learned so much here about how to support others going through such grief. Thank you for sharing yourself in this way. I love that you acknowledge ALL of your children. My heart continues to ache for you. Wish I could meet you in person someday!

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